Each week I host live trivia games at local bars and restaurants. Putting on each show is marginally inexpensive since I have already paid for my laptop, speakers, mic and all the other equipment needed to put on a show. My recurring costs are player score sheets, betting slips and pens. To cut costs, my brother and I bought a printer at Walmart for $50 and I can now print off all the paperwork needed.
Pens are the only remaining issue. Each week I put out pens for the players. I put out between 15 and 30 pens depending on how many I have on hand. No matter what number I put out, at least 75% disappear into another dimension and are never seen again. A pack of pens at the dollar store costs $1.06 with tax and I need at least 2.5 packs for each show. This also means that I have to make a special trip to the dollar store every week or so. In the grand scheme this seems like a minor problem but I have multiple shows each week so it is one I would still like to eliminate.
I have attempted to collect the pens after a show but end up with only a few chewed up tubes that no longer resemble writing utensils. I think that the players are getting so excited that they unconsciously need something to to gnaw on. It is also possible that they do not want to miss one second of trivia and put the pens in their mouths to delay a much needed smoke break. Either way the recovery strategy has been a futile effort.
Lots of businesses give away free pens to customers to promote their businesses. Ideally they would like each customer to take one, and only one. They do not want some industrious trivia host walking off with 40 pens after each visit. Driving all over town and getting one free pen from a bunch of businesses would not be time effective or cost effective since I would have to pay my own gas. Just walking into a business and taking a free pen without making a purchase is something you might do once. Over time even the most inept employees will catch on and ask you to stop taking those pens.
The ideal free pen scenario would be a place I already frequent where I would not have to buy anything and I also have a reason to be there so as not to arouse suspicion of vigilant employees. Initially I considered my bank as a possible source but all their pens are chained to the teller stations. Plus I do most of my banking online or at an ATM so I do not frequent the bank enough to fulfill my needs.
Planet Fitness to the rescue again. In the front by the check in station there is a lounge area. There are tables and each one is loaded with at least 50 pens. I have been sticking to a brutal 4-5 weekly visit workout regime. Each time on my way out I grab four pens. They have a staff that constantly rotates shift times so no one has caught on yet and I'm sure that these highly motivated drones could not care less. This also has the added benefit that when I pass them out I tell the players that I only grab one pen on each visit, increasing their belief that I go to the gym a lot. They write in purple but no one seems to mind.
Now I am able to spend that Pen gathering time more effectively on engineering superior puns for my upcoming games. This system is much more dependable than carrying around a bunch of broken pencils, because broken pencils are pointless.